The tourist excuse.
Here it is, my entitlement to drive like an ass with impunity:
Why does this license plate give me the ability to disregard norms of the road and abandon all common courtesy when I get behind the wheel? Some astute readers might guess because the number of the beast is displayed upon this plate? Nope, that isn't it (though Christian drivers seem to tailgate me less when they think I have Lucifer riding shotgun, but I digress...).
The real reason my British Columbia license plate allows me to drive any damn way I please is because I am currently in Alberta.
And you know what that means? The tourist excuse!
Cut somebody off? Whoops, sorry I'm a tourist.
Weave in and out of traffic? Ooops, I'm not from here, I must be lost.
Slamming on my breaks and turning without signaling? Ohhh, I'm from BC and that means I'm a tourist, so better give me the benefit of the doubt.
Not wearing a seatbelt? Hmmm, I'm from BC, I don't think they wear seat belts there.
Driving 130km on the wrong side of the road through a school-zone, with a girl on my lap while smacked up on PCP's and Jack Daniels? Uhhh...nevermind, you get the picture.
So moral of the story: this doesn't just apply to Alberta. It doesn't matter where you live, I recommend that you go to a neighbouring province/state to register for insurance. Come back, and you too will be driving with exemption and freedom from all traffic laws thanks to the venerable tourist excuse. Just remember: after every infraction just give either a conciliatory wave, or a shrug accompanied with a 'sorry, I didn't know better' glance and all will be forgiven.
Why does this license plate give me the ability to disregard norms of the road and abandon all common courtesy when I get behind the wheel? Some astute readers might guess because the number of the beast is displayed upon this plate? Nope, that isn't it (though Christian drivers seem to tailgate me less when they think I have Lucifer riding shotgun, but I digress...).
The real reason my British Columbia license plate allows me to drive any damn way I please is because I am currently in Alberta.
And you know what that means? The tourist excuse!
Cut somebody off? Whoops, sorry I'm a tourist.
Weave in and out of traffic? Ooops, I'm not from here, I must be lost.
Slamming on my breaks and turning without signaling? Ohhh, I'm from BC and that means I'm a tourist, so better give me the benefit of the doubt.
Not wearing a seatbelt? Hmmm, I'm from BC, I don't think they wear seat belts there.
Driving 130km on the wrong side of the road through a school-zone, with a girl on my lap while smacked up on PCP's and Jack Daniels? Uhhh...nevermind, you get the picture.
So moral of the story: this doesn't just apply to Alberta. It doesn't matter where you live, I recommend that you go to a neighbouring province/state to register for insurance. Come back, and you too will be driving with exemption and freedom from all traffic laws thanks to the venerable tourist excuse. Just remember: after every infraction just give either a conciliatory wave, or a shrug accompanied with a 'sorry, I didn't know better' glance and all will be forgiven.
posted by Kwazer at 11:16 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home